Self-esteem and family relationships

The first sign of trouble in the family relations - the lack of a smile on a woman's face. Tensely compressed lips, sad wrinkle, cutting his forehead, dormant, dull eyes, sad, anguished or angry facial expression, plod. When you meet a woman, it can not but feel the pain and realize that the house she was wrong.

Wanting to change something in our lives, we women, we begin to act spontaneously, at nothing: indignant, crying, shouting, rolls up the stage, forgetting that there is nothing more repulsive to a man and harder for children than thunderous woman, cursed, threatened and insulted .

Not better, and self-deprecating groans, tears of helplessness, pleas for compassion, respect for the request, begging love. Do not bring success and measures of the type "prison love": the refusal of communication, silence, prohibition of intimacy. And if we add to this painful the inevitable guilt that arises every time after another "stormy scenes"? In short, what would you do under the influence of resentment or anger, anger or despair, all is not only not lead to success, but on the contrary, tighter zavyazhet sites family conflict.

But no matter how hopeless deadlock and neither seemed to us a family situation, a lot can change, if strongly reject attempts to alter the life of the old, futile, and make every effort to find new ones.

Think for yourself, after all, a difficult situation did not come immediately, not in one day. The pain, grievances, problems have been accumulating gradually. Therefore, the same gradual and, perhaps, be a long process of healing and the family.

How to start? With yourself! You should begin with the ability to understand ourselves and to love. Understand their own uniqueness in this world and love for this and for all what you think, feel, create - for all that is good and good comes from you!
Is it difficult? But choose a time for yourself, stop it, at least half an hour, and again going over in memory insulting, wounding words, do not go back to the dark memories. Just ask yourself - who you are, how are you? Think about those days, the moments when you were happy and enjoyed themselves, about the deeds and actions, for which you self-respect, everything what you are proud.

It does not matter whether it is a great achievement at work or to hear a lot of nice compliments once your mind in a new dress. Maybe it will be the memories of summer trips or unusually pleasant vacation, the first love or good deeds, committed by you to someone. Going over it all in memory, focus, feel like individuals, feel his own worth in this life.

That's the feeling of self-worth is the most important psychological factor that determines everything that happens to a man inside his own peace of mind and around him, in communicating with other people. This imprint itself, its personal significance, which have each of us.

This feeling is not inherited, not genetically conditioned. It is formed in us from birth to death, so never too late to appreciate themselves. Anyone, even the most difficult, the time of our lives may become a primary impetus to improve its relations with itself.

When this takes place, will change your view on what is happening around you. You must remember and know that everything that you feel you are doing, worrying, your mind and soul, body and feelings - this is only yours and nobody's more! You belong to your dreams and deeds, your victories and successes, your accomplishments and your mistakes. And you live with all this, dispose of, building their lives and family relationships.

You are on forces and take a decision and execute it to the end. Now in a tranquil state, you can think about family relationships, which have become a serious problem, to find in them their own miscalculations and mistakes. If you love your husband and want to keep the family together, try to understand what he wants from you, which is seeking. It is possible that the cause of the deterioration of family relationships have become so insignificant things, inflated offense that the sound reflection, it hurts for his inability to control himself at the right time.
All people are different, and way of thinking, perception of things, even the husband and wife who have lived many years in one house may be different. Try to understand the claim of her husband, compare them with their grievances. If there is to be a lack of understanding, inability to communicate with each other, what annoys you, offends, insults, seek the path to this understanding.

Dissatisfaction, reproaches, bewilderment or resentment should not empty into a hysteria of insults to each other on the head, mixing all here that have accumulated over many years of claim. If you are offended by something - say so calmly as possible, explain why you are offended at this or that behavior, actions, words. Believe me, my husband you would understand, if ... if he also wants to preserve the family, peace and prosperity at home and in family relations.

And if not? Well, think for yourself, whether you want to live with a man who, knowing everything is deliberately trying to hurt you? And does so even after you have repeatedly explained to him the depth of their resentment. All the same, sooner or later, this family is destroyed, but how much humiliation and tears have to swallow before the end?

One reason for the deterioration of family relationships is a betrayal of her husband. And then you should not punish himself for what he found better than you, that you are not bad, that you do not like. The cause of infidelity are not necessarily shortcomings of his wife. But what to do next, what to do - it is necessary to solve it. Definitive conclusion that can not be forgiven, and output - a divorce, do so immediately so it is not necessary, even if you advise it on all sides. Too many women, simply a mistake her husband, live happily for many years. But if you understand clearly that will never be able to remove from the heart of resentment and forgive, decide whether to live on.

A woman with a developed sense of dignity, self-consciously value of supporting self-assessment at the appropriate level, no one can compel to live as she wants! Every day we have lived through - not a draft, which is tomorrow can be rewritten without corrections. Even the time fixed bugs are notched at the bottom of our memory, and what to talk about serious issues, which destroy us all the time?

But to make important decisions, we should calmly and deliberately. If we want to be listened to talk quietly. Louder than insulting and hysterical sound arguments, the less chance that they will hear. On the contrary, you will have to look no less than insulting words to resist the onslaught, without any concern, you are right or not.

The woman, confident in itself, creates an atmosphere around the peace, goodwill and love. If you are able to understand this, you will understand and your loved ones, they may begin to feel as they began to feel and yourself. You will listen, you will start to look closely, you will be interested, perhaps, as this has never happened before in your life ... And all this could be the beginning of the happy life of your dreams!